Beatrice Hawley

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Bad

Remember when you dreamed
day after day
about being really bad?
Bad like the girl
who got pregnant at age sixteen
or the guy who set fires
or that terrible boy, Christopher,
who killed his parents.

When you listened for the next
Buddy Holly song on the radio
far into the night
and dreamed about running
away to Greenwhich Village?

But you never did.
Listening to Buddy Holly at 2 AM
on a schoolnight
was as bad as you could manage
and you never even got caught.

So you swallow your life
like a whole apple
you can't taste.

Other people do things
you watch them.

And you become a most wonderful liar.